If you have a dating question for The Dating Advice Girl, send to Erin@TheDatingAdviceGirl.com
Q. Dear Dating Advice Girl, I hate asking girls out because they might say no to going out with me. Sometimes I just don’t ask girls out even if I’m interested because I just assume she’ll say no. How do I deal with rejection when asking out a girl?
A. Everyone has to deal with rejection some of the time. Consider the following:
1. No one gets a ‘Yes’ 100% of the time
Just like you are not going to be interested in dating everyone, not everyone is going to be interested in dating you. Harsh? Maybe, but thinking about rejection logically will help you to get over a random ‘No’ from a random person. Dating is a numbers game…..keep looking for the potential love-interests that will say ‘Yes’
2. A ‘No’ from one person makes room for a ‘Yes’ from someone else
When you hear a ‘No’ from someone, that person is simply making you available to other potential love-interests that will cross your path. I’d take a definite ‘No’ rather than a halfhearted ‘Yes’ anytime! You want to date people who emphatically want to date you and spend time with you. A ‘No’ can be a blessing in disguise because it can lead you to someone who is a better fit for you and actively choosing to be with you.
Ultimately it’s up to you to shift a ‘No’ from a potential love-interest into something positive. Remember that in dating, as in life in general, you are going to have to take some risks. You might not always get the result you are looking for immediately, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try. Put that random ‘No’ in the past, and move on optimistically to those girls who are as excited about you as you are about them.